Narrative

We all need a chance once in a while to rewire our brains, take out unnecessary stresses, and create new mindsets. We need calm places with minimal drama that allow our minds to wander. Living this life is just as psychological as it is physical. We sleep to allow our bodies to rest. Yet, even when we are sleeping, our minds keep spiraling, creating vivid and abstract images to entertain our paralyzed, unconscious bodies. For me, my lake house is the mecca in which I free my mind. One of the most important experiences I had there helped shape me into the person I am today.

            Everyone dreams of a place where they are able to escape from reality, from the stress of their daily lives, from the chaos and seemingly never-ending movement that the world carries. From the time I was born, I was fortunate enough to have such a place. My family, with whom I am very close, owns a small cottage that my father’s father built in Northern Michigan. The cabin is quaint and rustic, but it is our paradise. We make the eight-hour trek about twice every summer. Our cottage is located on a small island – called Island 8 – in the Upper Peninsula on a bay directly off of Lake Heron.

            Once that drive is coming close to an end, and we see the REYMANN sign jutting out between the trees, the attitude of everyone in the car begins to change to that of little kids when an ice cream truck is rounding their corner. We pull up to tall trees and vivacious flowers and animal whispers as the tires crunch and pop over the gravel driveway.

            The first thing we do when we pile out of our car is saunter straight down to what we call the “basement,” referring to our dock upon the lake. The serenity of the environment is astounding: lush bushes, blooming flowers, soft sand, and crisp water stretches on as far as the eye can see. And it was there where I realized at such a very young age what my purpose in life is.

            Whenever I had moments to myself, I’d go down and sit on the edge of the dock, dangling my feet over the water, and teach myself to sing. I’d sing anything and everything. When I was around seven or eight years old, I remember, my favorite song to sing was “Amazing Grace.” I would sing that song over and over, changing words and melodies. Singing made me feel alive and happy. It still does.  

             My freshman year of high school rolled around and it was a tremendous personal struggle. I became separated from my best friend of seven years. She went to DeSales HS, and I parted to Bishop Watterson. I lost who I was, my sense of right and wrong, and most importantly my values. I was clinically depressed with a hatred for my school and everyone inside of it. I took my anger out at home hurting myself and the people around me. I said things to my parents that I’m not proud of, had thoughts I’m not proud of, and the way I looked at school, well, I’m definitely not proud of that. Every morning I rolled out of bed with bags under my eyes from the little sleep I was fortunate enough to get, threw my hair on top of my head and walked out the door without a single drop of makeup on. Simply because I didn’t care. I didn’t care about anything. Singing was the only thing that brought me happiness. I wasn’t healthy, and that scared me.

            I begged my mom to let me change schools just to give me a different environment. At the swing of my freshman to my sophomore year, I did switch schools to Olentangy Orange HS. I was given the opportunity to start over and figure out exactly who I am. I climbed out of the dark hole I’d been stuck inside and into a completely new frame of mind. My mind. The positive thought process and way of existing I’d thought I’d lost. And I loved it. I do love it. I love the person I am today and the life I am living.

            That left me with one question: Now that I have my life moving on a positive slope, what am I going to do with it? That’s a big question for a seventeen year old. I’m too creative of a spirit to be cooped up inside of an office, and the “typical” career majors college freshmen choose just never interested me. So I asked myself, “What makes you happy?” Easy: Music. My purpose in life is to do something with music.

            Music sits by my side, holding my hand, making it easy to face the demons that haunt my days. I think of my little cottage and the experience of being introduced to music on my dock. Every summer, I go back up north, sit on the edge of my dock, dangle my feet over the water just like I did when I was eight years old, and silently thank God for blessing me with such a place that brought me to sing. I tried out for our school talent show in the beginning of my senior year and our chorus teacher heard me and warmly welcomed me into the choir program that I was initially so scared to join. It was a terrifying thought for me to try and situate myself into something that was already so established. I got very lucky. Now, I take vocal and piano lessons and am currently working my way to get into OSU’s School of Music.

I don’t know specifically what I want to do in music, but I do know that I am going to put my love and passion for it to good use and show how music holds power. It holds power in the sense of peoples’ emotions, power in a sense of changing the mood of a situation, and, especially, power in driving my life forward to a future I cannot wait to be apart of.